I can feel the change within me.

I no longer feel the need to try to get him to change his mind.

I no longer feel the need to try to get him to see what he has done to us.

I no longer feel the need to hold onto something that is long gone.

The man I married died when his mother did. I cannot save him or bring him back to the man he once was.

I have gone through the grieving process (although sometimes I fall back a little) to grieve him and the hope of a solid marriage.

I don’t feel chained by my emotions anymore. That lead weight that used to hold me down until I couldn’t breathe is no longer there.

This had nothing to do with me.

It’s all him.

He made these decisions without looking at the people around him. He didn’t think about the ripple effect.

ripple effect is a situation where, like the ever expanding ripples across water when an object is dropped into it, an effect from an initial state can be followed outwards incrementally.

He is that object.

Our lives are forever changed due to his selfish and narcissistic ways.

I will not dwell on him no longer. I can only think about the future and what is best for us.

Spring is here and so is a time for rebirth. New plants popping up after being held prisoner and suffocating by the long harsh winter. They push their tired, creaky, achy sprouts up through the hard ground.

They’re free.

They face the sun and welcome the warmth.

I’m free.


2 thoughts on “Changes

What do you think?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s