Change. I hate it. I don’t think I’ve met many people who do enjoy it. I am scared. Scared of making the wrong decision for me and my children.
Scared that they’ll resent me if we move 2.5 hours away from their father.
Scared that I’ll make the wrong decision and will royally screw them up for life.
I have two job interviews scheduled for teaching jobs at home. When all of this first startedIi was ANGRY. I applied for any job far, far away from here. Now that they are coming back with interviews I am NERVOUS.
I have support in both cities. I live in a GREAT neighborhood with fantastic neighbors who have stuck by me during this whole mess. I have a job that I love and I am content in my house.
At home I have my friends and family. My kids can be near their grandparents. They have friends there. I have support there too. I don’t have a house or job yet.
Does anyone have a crystal ball for me to look into? I have no idea what to do or what to think. All I have done is take one day at a time. Thinking about the future. Makes me sad, anxious, uneasy, unsure and back on this emotional roller coaster.
If we move I would have to meet their father every other weekend so he can take them…to her house….because that’s where she lives. Just thinking about that makes my stomach churn and I want to puke. They both make me sick.
ANY DID THIS HAPPEN TO ME? WHY DID THE PERSON I MARRIED EVOLVE INTO THIS SELFISH, NASTY, MEAN MONSTER???
Why am I letting it bother me? Someone else make my life decisions for me. I need a nap.