my ship lights


noun: friend; plural noun: friends; noun: Friend; plural noun: Friends
  1. 1.
    a person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically exclusive of sexual or family relations.
    syn: companion, soul mate, confidant, similar, kindred spirit, sidekick, buddy, homies, bff, peeps, best friend, ally…
    Ship lights.
    What a feeling it is to know that my friends are there to keep me safe in the stormiest of nights. Stormiest days. Stormiest hours. Stormiest minutes, seconds, nanoseconds.
    They are my blessings. My girls. My shoulders to lean on and feet to keep me moving forward.
    I got back a few hours ago from our annual weekend away. This year we went to NYC for a few days. It’s like not a day has passed and we pick up right where we left off the last time. I can BE MYSELF with my girls. WE can be ourselves. I shake off all of the cobwebs, drama, hateful feelings, bitterness, etc and just be me. It’s 48 hours of constant laughter. Quick witted comebacks and one-liners. Hugs, laughter, happiness, jokes…
    ship lights.
    We all got to NY sometime in the afternoon on Friday. Everyone was traveling from different states..MD, NH, MA and two of us from NY.  Every trip we take, I have a travel buddy. Makes it that much more fun. One year we drove, the next took a train and this year we flew. Planes, trains and automobiles!
    The weekend went way too fast. Friday night we decided to really let loose and “indulge” more than we would on Saturday night. Who wants to be hungover traveling on Sunday? Not us.
    Friday was a blast. Bits and pieces are coming back to me. Drinks were flowing. Jokes were told. Stories were shared. Bonds were made.
    Saturday we walked. and walked. and walked. We shopped. and shopped. and shopped. In Chinatown we found a sign that said “COLDASS WATER, $3.”  More laughter. We followed a sketchy lady to some hideout behind a statue of a Chinese dragon. There we were; huddled in a circle, checking out their knock off purses. A secret society.  A sketchy secret society…
    Cab rides. Scary drivers. Nasty cologne. Brand new cabs. Screeching. Stopping. Going. Honking. Constant stimulation in NYC. I could never live there.
    Saturday night. I have not had that much fun in a LONG, LONG, LONG time. We laughed until our stomachs were sore and then we’d laugh some more. We made friends with the waiter–it was his last night working there. He is striving to be a comedian. Little did he know, we are quite funny ourselves. You can only imagine the banter that went back and forth. All night. We filled our stomachs with delicious food and drink. The diets were tossed away until Monday. Deserts were eaten. The wine was flowing. The conversation was never serious. Light. Fun. It always is.
    Today we had to say good bye to each other. It’s always bittersweet because I don’t want to leave; yet I know we will be traveling again next year to make more memories. And more after that. We all leave to go back to our routine. Back to reality. Back to the daily grind. Back to our children; them to their spouses.
    I don’t know what I would do if I didn’t have them in my life. I need them to help me weather my storm. I know I can count on them whenever I need them. They know that they can count on me too.
    I need my ship lights. Life is quite a stormy journey.

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