is this it?

I love the quote, “everything happens for a reason.”

I use it to explain a lot of things that has happened in my life. Good. Bad. Indifferent “things.”

But WHAT is that reason? Did my stbex choose this life so that I can be punished for something? For something in my past? Is this my karma?

I am lonely. The kids went with him this morning and won’t be back until 6:00 tomorrow night. I am lonely.

Why does he get to have someone to spend his time with? I have spent the whole day doing nothing. I am lonely.

I want someone to share my empty time with. I get so sad and down when it’s just me in this house. My friends are all busy with their families and I am here. Alone. I’ts not their problem that I’m alone. I am jealous of their lives.

Jealous, sad, lonely, depressed, throwing a pity party right now.

I could pop a xanax and go to bed right now. Last night, I went to bed at 8:30. My Friday night was CRAZY!

I am such an outgoing, people person. This is not good for me. I can’t take it.

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3 thoughts on “is this it?

  1. I had a terrible time when I was alone in the beginning. After a while, I found enjoyment in some activities that can be better done when ‘alone’ and began to enjoy my moments of solitude.
    It did not help the anxiety that would overcome me when I knew my children were with ‘them’, but it did help me overcome the feelings of loneliness.

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